Hello, lovelies. I’ve been away but I’ll be writing about our new house and add before and after pics to boot. Watch out for those!
But now for something completely different:
One of my best friends from the Philippines got married a couple of days ago.
She, another good friend, and I were batch mates that took up Music, lived the demanding life of musicians and music teachers. We were so dedicated to our muse that we put marriage at the back of our mind. That, and the fact that we didn’t want to shake up our life/routine for just any guy. We held out for the right one. We dated and had relationships and learned about men and how it is to be one-half of a twosome. Of course, for each man we were with we hoped for the best. But we didn’t say “yes” to the idea of marriage until we were very sure.
Out of us three, and hardly as much as other women with their fairy tale ideas, Chris was the one who seemed to want to get married the most. While the two of us had our family, she went off on her own for college and spent years working hard to support herself and her music. I’ve always admired Chris’ steadfastness and how she was able to juggle everything without falling apart. When she started teaching at our University and the “Boy’s Club of the Composition Department” relegated her and her music to the sidelines, she forged on and create her own channels to make her music heard. She got her PhD and won best dissertation on the year she graduated. She’s now the department chairperson of Composition at the University of the Philippines.
But, despite her achievements, Chris yearned for companionship. And when she met Ti at one of the conferences she participated in in the US, she formed a bond with him. She came back home and they started a long-distance relationship only the most patient of women could endure. She wanted more but the timing was never right. I can’t say this is a correct recollection of the progression of things, but Chris and Ti were together for a year when our friend got married and it was just us two spinsters left. (Haha!) Then after a couple of years, I met Bronne and that got me hitched. And Chris, on her singleness lonesome, endured. And just when she told me that she’s going to have to be content in her long-distance love affair, the universe deemed it the right time for these two to exhale and be together-together.
Chris getting married is an end of an era. I don’t get sentimental about weddings and I’m hardly sentimental about mine, but she’s the last one. All three of us have crossed over to this different realm. These past two days, I recalled all the breaks from our classes, then all the ones from our teaching life, when we’d meet, planned or accidentally, and talk about men, relationships, marriage, and our music. Our lives without men, our lives with them. What it would be like to be married, to have children, not to have children and have pets instead. LIFE.
I am filled to the brim with gratefulness for having met my two good friends. They’ve put up with my growing pains, my volatile mood swings and banshee craziness. They’ve seen the change in me after I battled my demons and slowly found my place in the world. They are my oldest friends and are witnesses to my life, and I always found my way to them, to their little room/oasis in our college, every time I needed someone to talk to.
Chris and Issay, I miss you both and wish you both more music and a life well-lived. Always.
And now, back to the regular programming. Me cleaning our house, that is. 🙂