2009 was a very eventful year for me.
After months of discussions and weighing, B. and I married. We were together for 3 weeks then he left for the US to teach while I finished my studies and contract as a high school music teacher. In February-March, I was in Korea to represent my country in an all-traditional instrument orchestra. I graduated, finished my year as a music teacher, went back to Korea for another concert, then began the arduous preparations to come here. I packed my whole life in one week but took months to make peace with leaving my mom, my nieces, other family members including my dogs, friends, work, established routines, my school, many of my things, and what was good about my country. And most importantly, because B. and I spent little time living together, I had to make peace with being married.
I’ve had several relationships before I met B. After the naivete of my early 20’s had faded away, I stopped ‘waiting’ for marriage. I turned down a couple of proposals and, after a while, questioned the relevance of having a steady relationship in my life that wouldn’t result in marriage anyway. Does one really need a boyfriend?
Then, when I was content in being without a man, B. turned up.
It’s weird and wondrous how some things come to you when you’ve made peace with not having it, or when you’ve never really wanted it in the first place. I’ve been told that I’ve been lucky because I had done things many people can only daydream about. But most of these things, I never asked for so I don’t feel particularly lucky.
But with B., I consider myself bestowed upon a profound gift. He is my mirror, comfort, laughter, joy, wisdom, and peace. My best friend and match.
I am very lucky indeed.Dress: Cop Copine, thrifted back home, and shortened by me (it was ankle-length and awkward when I got it). The gray mesh sleeves is part of the dress and one reason why I adore this dress. Gray tights: $2, Marshall’s Purple Suede Ankle Boots: Le Saunde, thrifted brand new back home!
On B.: White long-sleeves with purple and pink stripes: Ben Sherman, $37, SIMS